Everyone can benefit from mentoring, but have you tried the alternative?

Theirishscouter has been fortunate in having had some impressive and generous mentors in life to date, both in career but also in Scouting.

Seasoned figures with vast banks of experience, who have offered sage advice. Sometimes, these figures have gently curbed the odd excess or tendency towards ill-judged actions. In one’s earlier days, these potential excesses are often driven by inexperience. Later, the odd bout of cynicism or a desire to rock the boat a little too much can sometimes benefit from a quiet word.

A mentor can play a central role in one’s life. More commonly, they are the person around who’s kitchen table you pace, late at night as you work through a problem – often one of one’s own making. They might be your hiking companion, labouring up hills and skirting rivers whilst you huff out your problems as they gasp back thoughts on how to solve them.

Of course, as one moves through life, many of those rough corners get smoothed out by life itself; the experiences, errors of judgement, mistakes and ‘seemed like a good idea at the time’ ideas that upon mature reflection, never quite seem worth repeating.

We all probably learn far more from our mistakes than from our successes. A mentor however can guide us though difficult patches, new challenges and sticky situations we have not encountered previously.

The tendency to look upwards in age range for a mentor is entirely understandable. After all, is it not experience one seeks when inviting a mentor into one’s deliberations?

Theirishscouter realized a few years back that mentors in fact come in all shapes and sizes – they also come sometimes with surprising age profiles.

As a scouter, most of us come into contact not just with inspirational elders on the Scouting trail, but plenty of younger people who can also inspire. Theirishscouter learned early on (as no doubt some readers did), that seeking and listening to advice from a young person can provide a lot of value.

Interaction with water provides an example. A few years back, a highly energetic toddler from the offspring collection took off in a pool towards the deep end. Theirishscouter’s general view on water has always been that it is palatable to drink and acceptable to wash in, but that’s about all the interaction required.

As a side note, when Scouting Ireland formed, the pre-uniform period was a bit of a free for all and theirishscouter could not resist getting hold of an SAI shirt to wear at NMC meetings, just to irk the elders – not the mentors; the ‘old boys’ club (the mentors approved!). It also afforded an opportunity to wear a Sea Scout jumper (as vastly preferable to wearing a shirt, but not credible for a land lubber prior to this…)

In any event, as junior went ever further into the deep end, merrily suggesting I follow him, I did precisely that. He is now eleven and theirishscouter, whilst not a strong swimmer, is infinitely more comfortable in water – a great example of exiting the comfort zone at the invitation of a younger mentor. My Dad had tried to get me swimming when I was in Beaver Scouts, and no amount of bribery would get me anywhere NEAR water…

Whilst Scouters of course can often get away with er, supervising some of the more active pursuits in Scouting, when one has offspring there is usually an expectation of full and enthusiastic participation, be it zip lining, white water rafting, snorkelling or clambering into a roller coaster. It is not mentoring in the conventional sense, but it does re-frame thought processes and create the conditions for trying new things.

As children become tweens and then teenagers, it is a mark of respect to treat them and their views with ever greater seriousness. All opinions count, but listening carefully to teens, following their line of argument and acting on it as much as possible builds a strong relationship. It also throws up some great insights.

Of course, outside the family and beyond Scouting, the idea of seeking ideas and advice from younger people works too. Theirishscouter retains a network of mentors in the world of business, but these days some of these people are starting out in their careers or are a few years less advanced on the career curve.

There is a great opportunity for exchange of advice in these circumstances, with timeless challenges solved for the younger person by the sage advice of the worldly executive, whilst the grizzled elder can get great insights and ideas from the Young Turk on topics around new technology and new ways of working.

Theirishscouter would advise everyone to consider adding a new mentor to their line up over the summer, be it an elder or younger (or both). Why not BE a mentor to someone too – you might find yourself lending some ideas or methods to someone who will be quoting you in years to come to another generation.

*Theirishscouter normally does not publish two articles in rapid succession, however there is a bit of a backlog of positive pieces that keep getting held up by media stories, hence the desire to publish something quick, just in case!